Insya-Allah We'll Find The Way

Everytime you feel like you cannot go on
You feel so lost
That your so alone
All you is see is night
And darkness all around
You feel so helpless
You can`t see which way to go
Don`t despair and never loose hope
Cause Allah is always by your side

Insya Allah 2x
Insya Allah you`ll find your way

Everytime you can make one more mistake
You feel you can`t repent
And that its way too late
Your`re so confused,wrong decisions you have made
Haunt your mind and your heart is full of shame



[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/inyaallah-lyrics-maher-zain.html ]

Don`t despair and never loose hope
Cause Allah is always by your side
Insya Allah 2x
Insya Allah you`ll find your way
Insya Allah 2x
Insya Allah you`ll find your way

Turn to Allah
He`s never far away
Put your trust in Him
Raise your hands and pray
OOO Ya Allah
Guide my steps don`t let me go astray
You`re the only one that showed me the way,
Showed me the way 2x
Insya Allah 2x
Insya Allah we`ll find the way

Library, is it suppose to be noisy??

I had to type this out and share it here in my blog.

I was in a library, of course here in UPSI when I was typing this down. I was here from 12pm doing my work and yes, I was not the only one here in the library.. (duhh...)

First of all, let’s take a look at the definition of library.

www.thefreedictionary.com/library:

A place in which literary and artistic materials, such as books, periodicals, newspapers, pamphlets, prints, records, and tapes, are kept for reading, reference, or lending.

While my definition of library is the place where you can read books and do your work or even sleep due to its quiet and cosy surroundings. But what happened today was, on the third floor, where I was sitting by myself at the study table and there were several other tables behind me, there were a few students who sat there and started to talk....... or discuss....

It’s not that I don’t mind, I just don’t CARE at all what you want to do in the library, but please respect others around you trying to do work!

If you want to discuss or having conversation with your friends, like your parents bought this whole library, please go somewhere else where making noise is not a disturbance for no one. It was SO ANNOYING having people like that when you’re trying to focus  and do work. Yes the library is a public place, anyone can come in and out, but do you need to talk that loud or be that ignorant. 

YES, THAT’S THE WORD, IGNORANT!

Whenever you want to do something, please think what if you are in their shoes. What if I go to the library, with several of my friends, having discussion with them and talk like the whole damn floor in the library is OURS? Won’t you be so pissed off and annoyed? It’s so simple, respect other people and people will respect you in return. That’s all. It’s not hard at all. All I can say it that “dorang nih takde adab btol!”

It may sound harsh, but hey, come on, we're Malaysian right, we are popular of our “adab sopan dan santun, saling hormat-menghormati”, so why don’t you show it then.

I’m just REALLY PISSED OFF right now. Just remember, unless your parents owns the library, please respect others and try to not be as annoying as possible ( referring to loud discussion and conversation)

SOFIE ACTUALLY WENT UP TO THE 4^TH FLOOR DUE TO NOT BEING ABLE TO BE PATIENCE TO THE NOISE BEING MADE BY THE PEOPLE ON THE 3^RD FLOOR.

IT HURTS!!!

This semester, I’ve been to the clinic like several times, and today my entry will be on me going to clinic again.. haihh~

Am I sick? No. Then, why do I need to go to the clinic? Well, I AM not sick, but there’s something wrong with my back [ area ‘pinggang’]

The first time I noticed the pain was during ‘raya’, but it wasn’t that bad, so I ignored it.

Then on last Monday, I realise that the pain was no ordinary pain like I used to have every month, I was hoping that it will go away and it was nothing like what I’ve experience before that made a friend of mine to call me ‘nenek’ [ my body posture wasn’t straight due to back-pain].

The next day, Tuesday, my movement became restricted, it was hard for me to bend my body!

During prayer, I can’t even do my ‘rukuk’ properly, and even ‘sujud’! Ya Allah.. only He knows the pain that I have to endure.

Later at night I asked one of the PUDING, Nina, to massage my back as she is good in massaging.

It hurts like OMG! when she started to massage me. The rest of the PUDING were curious why didn’t I scream though it hurts so much? Well, I seriously not the type of a girl that screams. Prove?

1.      1.  When my phone was snatch by the STUPID ‘mat rempit’ on my way back from work [ after SPM I  worked as a waitress in Secret Recipe ] at night, I didn’t scream but I cried.

2.       2. When my finger was ‘tersepit’ at Effa’s door car, I didn’t scream, instead I just cried till one of the PUDING realised it and opened the door for me.

... and many more, but I can’t recall.

Starting that night I had difficulties in walking, I mean like REALLY HARD for me to walk. I walked so slow, one small step at a time. Took me quite some time to move from one place to another. GOD!

Today, Wednesday, I only had one class that was Phonetics & Phonology. The class was all the way at Proton City that took about 20 minutes to get there by car, and almost 30 minutes by bus.

Lucky me Effa drove her car to class today so I get to ride with her. But to get in the car was a problem for me. I CAN’T BEND MY BODY! They had to wait for me to get in the car and the way I get in the car was like a pregnant lady!

I have to sit up straight all the time and I mean REALLY STRAIGHT! Like a model learning how to sit.

I was in GREAT pain.

I’m not the type of a girl that easily cry when I got hurt, I just bare with it, not the ‘mengada-ngada’ kind of girl okay.

The pain was so SUPERB that I really can’t stand it very much, I tried to pretend like I was okay and there’s nothing to worry about but my movement shows that I AM NOT OKAY AT ALL.

You know, in class, you do need to move around. For me, to sit and move my body a bit so that I can write on the table was A GREAT DEAL for me! IT HURTS!

Even the lecturer was curious, what was wrong with me.

Dr.Che Ton: Syakira, are you okay?

Chewy: She got kidney problem.

Me: No! My back hurts, it’s hard for me to move around.

[ Dr. Che Ton call me Syakira all the time, and Chewy, as usual, making jokes. ]

Dr. Che Ton : You shouldn’t be sitting down, you need to lay down Syakira.

As much as I want to but where can I lay down in class??

We moved on with our class and I continued baring the pain, till suddenly I can’t hold it anymore, that I ACCIDENTALLY cried.

Dr. Che Ton: Syakira, what’s wrong?! Dah teruk sangat dah ni, kenapa tak pergi klinik?

Me: I’m going to, after class, Effa’s taking me there.

Dr. Che Ton: Dah, dah, pergi sekarang. Pack your stuff. Where’s Effa? Go! Go!

When she said that, I can’t hold my tears anymore, I cried so hard because it does REALLY HURTS!

So, off Effa, Chewy and me went to the clinic. It took me for almost an hour waiting for my turn in the clinic.

Doctor: Kenapa kamu sakit pinggang ni?

Me: Saya pun tak tau la doctor.

Doctor: Kamu ade jatuh ke? Buat kerja berat?

Me: Jatuh takde la, tapi buat kerja berat ade.

Doctor: Kamu orang perempuan, tak boleh buat kerja berat2 sangat ni, bahaya.

Me: Tapi da agak lama dah, saya angkat barang berat tu masa awal bulan puasa hari tu, sekarang baru kena effect?

Doctor: Kamu suka minum air sejuk kan?

Me: [Smiling.. ] Ye, saya..

Doctor: Ais tu boleh kasi otot kita lemah dik, ni bukan masalah tulang kamu, otot kamu ni dah lemah. Dah kahwin ke belum ni?

Me: Belum. = ='

Doctor: Macam mana kamu nak mengandung nanti, buat kerja berat mcm ni da sakit2, tu la, orang pompuan kena jaga, otot kita x sama dgn otot lelaki. Skrg, kamu cuba elakkan diri drpd buat kerja berat. Berhenti minum ais terus.

ERK! Stop from drinking cold drinks?! WHY?!

I asked the doctor to give me an injection to ease out my pain like how the last time I did.

It cost me RM45 for the injection and medicine! I’ve used my sticker the last time where I can get treatment for free, and I even used my friend’s sticker also for the second time. This time around, I got nobody else to ask for sticker, so I had to use my money. Plus it wouldn’t be fair for me to keep on using my friends’ sticker because they might need it too.

I went to sleep after I took my medicine and when I woke up, the pain did ease a bit, but it still hurts, even when I’m sitting down. And it was still hard for me to get off of my bed. Last time I got the injection, the pain ease out so fast and I was feeling great with no back pain. But this time around, I wonder why the medicine is not as effective as before? Is it because it is a different clinic? Different medicine? Different doctor?

This pain makes it hard for me to do work. I can’t sit for long, how am I going to do my assignments?

I can’t walk on normal pace, it’s hard for me to move around. Don’t even ask how I shower, put my clothes on, etc.! All I can tell you is that IT AIN’T EASY.

But, Alhamdulillah, the pain did ease a bit and I am in no position to keep on complaining and whining about the pain I have to endure right now.

I always remind myself, things happen for a reason. Maybe it’s a test for me and I need to be strong in facing it. Insya-Allah.

Allah is the one that gives us strengths, Allah is the one that will take it back.

Whenever we’re in pain, whenever we face problems, to Him we seek for help.

Ya Allah, kurangkan dan hapuskanlah kesakitan ku ini.

- okay sofie, no more lifting heavy objects!-


THANKS PUDING FOR ALWAYS HELPING ME OUT IN TIMES I NEED YOU LADIES.

My Raya!!!

Date: 18^th September 2010.

1^st avenue: Wangsa Walk

I have a date with someone whom I haven’t met for quite some time.

The last time we met I guess was like a year ago.. or more than that.

So, we decided to meet up in Wangsa Walk which was nearer to my place that I can eventually walk there, but I decided not to as the person who I wanted to meet has a car.

The person I’m talking about here is Siti Khadijah binti Sahak. My twin back in school in Madrasah Khairiah Islamiah. I’ve been in that school only for about three months, but during that whole three months, we were CLOSE! Like best friends. Where ever she goes, you’ll see me there, where ever I go, you’ll see her there, and because of that people started to call us TWINS!

She’s a very cheerful girl and now she’s teaching in a primary school [ and I’m about to be teaching in secondary school..] and YES we are in the same age.

She came and picked me up at my brother’s [kamil] place and we headed to Wangsa Walk.

We played bowling [CT paid for me.. hehee..] and watched movie. The movie we watched was ‘Devil’. As interesting as it may seem by the title ‘Devil’, to me it was not SO INTERESTING at all to be watch in cinema. I don’t want to critic the movie here in my blog because I don’t think I’m entitled for it.. YET.. but hey, I watched it, had fun looking at CT covering her eyes afraid of any surprises [ watch the movie and you’ll know what I mean], dropping her hotdog on her shirt when her phone vibrated [ tekejot plak CT nih..], laughing watching the movie..[ suppose to be thriller, but why do I laugh??.. Go ahead and watch it..].

I know I sounded like I’m promoting this movie as I keep on typing “Go and watch the movie” but actually I’m not. I don’t even know what I’m doing right now.... err......??????????????

Back to my date with my twin. Okay. After movie we went for window shopping, at first it was window shopping when suddenly CT fell in love with my favourite colour, BROWN.

She bought a hand bag matched with a purse for RM125. Okay, she works, she can afford it. I’m still studying and for me to but that will cost me to eat Maggie till the end of this semester. [ okay, I’m exaggerating, but hey, that shows my money is tight!]

Then we keep on walking looking for a dress for me to wear for dinner next month, just looking, not intending in buying one yet.

CT found a cute baby shirt and she bought it for her future husband’s sister’s son [ her future nephew to simplify] who was born the day before, on 17^th September. Hey, I just realize, it’s the same date as my eldest brother [ Izzee] was born!

As usual, before we [ CT and me] go home, we always plan to buy something that both of us will have, so she decided to but bracelets. Hers was girlish, but mine, as the promoter said, more ‘ranggi’... I guess..

Though we met for about 3-4 hours only, but we had a great time together, and she was willing to drive all by herself for almost an hour [due to traffic] all the way from Shah Alam to Wangsa Maju.

Yeah, we watched 'Devil'..

I know I look weird wearing shawl.. Oh Well~

Bowling time.. (^-^)

2^nd avenue: Aunty Yah’s house.

As we [ my family and I] reached her house, we were the first guest. Then as time flies, more and more of my relatives came. Yeah! Now this is what I call Raya on my mom’s side.

Raya= What a person should do is get a plate of rice, eat them up, have the second round plate of rice, sit down, have someone to pass around the kueh raya, fruits, peanuts, cakes, pudding, without having yourself to get up, chit chatting, LAUGHING!!

I was not looking forward in filling my stomach up with varieties of foods which later on will cost me hard time to do Silat when I’m back in UPSI this Sunday. So, I suggested to take pictures instead. My camera phone.... ermmm.. no comment.. I decided not to use mine, so luckily my cousins brought theirs.

So SNAP! SNAP! SNAP!

It doesn’t matter how old you are, you might be a grandmother now, and aunt maybe, just us young cousins, or our younger nephews and nieces, we all pose for the 2010 RAYA SNAP!

Even though not all of my relatives came along for the Open-House, but it was indeed HAPPENING= HEAD PENING!!

Thumbs Up!!

All the neneks, makciks, kakaks, adiks, & anak2 buahs..

[perosak bahasa.. = =' ]

But where are the guys???

If it comes to my mom’s side, to talk about food, maybe it looked simple, but once you taste it, I don’t mean to brag, but it’s FACT!.. Once you taste it you will want to have seconds! That’s what I did, hahaa!! Their style of cooking are FAST&DELICIOUS!

My eldest sis got the talent already [ Izan, klau Izan ade terbaca pujian Sofie nih, terima je lah~]. I went to her house on the 3^rd or 4^th of Syawal, I don’t really remember, her mother-in-law and the whole family suddenly decided to come, she prepared Mihun Goreng [ yah, I know it sound simple] in just a couple of minutes! You need to try them out then only you’ll know why I said she got the FAST&DELICIOUS style of cooking.

Most of my uncles are surprise to see me. Most of them still thought I’m studying in College. Some don’t even know what I’m doing right now. Well, my dear uncles, we only met like once a year and only during eid-ul-fitr, plus sometimes we don’t even get the chance to meet. But I’m glad to have them in my life as they always play a role as my dad since I was young, especially Uncle A’ai and Uncle Alang. I love them!

That’s all I guess for my entry this time around. Next, I’ll be updating on my Scrabble competition as I need to held one, my TESL Night [dinner] and maybe on debate that I need to perform with the rest of the PUDING for Wacana class.. = =’

Oh, before that, I’d like to type something, might be personal to me, or might not, depends, I’m not sure how to categories this.

Whenever it’s time for me to go back to Tg.malim, my ‘Kolej Kediaman’, from a long break, nor short break, I’ll always have bad mood. I mean really bad mood, I easily get pissed off at something, though it’s nothing to mad at, I don’t feel like talking, I tend to be a bit grumpy, I don’t know why but it happens. I don’t get angry like yelling or scolding at someone, I just.... feel so pissed off!

People might say because I’m the youngest and that’s why I’m acting like that whenever I have to depart from my family, but I don’t think being the youngest play a role in this situation. Yes I’m the youngest in my family but I’m not spoiled! [ when I say spoil I mean ‘mengada nak mampos’]. Then, why do I react like that? I’m still trying searching for an answer. But one thing I like when I’m about to leave from  my mom’s place, she will always make sure that I’ll have my cup of coffee before I go. And the only cup of coffee that is MY CUP OF COFFEE is the one that my mom makes. So milky, so dairy, my cup of coffee. Two things I look forward when I stay with my mom. 
COFFEE. 
ASAM PEDAS.

-out-

My eid-ul-fitr!!!

My eid-ul-fitr started at 7.30am as I was awoken by the noise of my mom doing work in the kitchen.

Oh my God, what time did I sleep last night..

Feeling guilty letting my mom do the prep for raya all by herself that morning, I quickly wash my face off and help out in the kitchen.

My job was cutting... cutting cakes, ketupat, etc...

After prayer, me and my mom waited for Izzee and Izan to arrive. Izan was from her in-law’s house as for my eldest brother Izzee, I don’t even know what took him so long to come to Kamil’s house where me, my mom, Amin and Kamil were during that early morning.

Only by 11am Izzee and Izan arrived, and we were all ready to head to Kepong, Aunty Ngah’s house, is a MUST every time when it comes for Raya.

Yeah~!!.. I love my mummy!!.. hehee..

[nak tunjuk mummy dapat cermin mata baru sbnr nyer.. =p]

Kamil and Amin didn’t come along because they were super sleepy and tired as they had to work from 5pm to 5am, so they stayed home.

Raya this time around wasn’t much fun, I didn’t get to meet most of my relatives, my brothers didn’t come along, didn’t take family picture, Daddy went to Kedah to celebrate eid at Ummie’s kampung.. haihh...

After collecting money.... I mean after raya at Aunty Ngah’s house, asking forgiveness and all... hehee.. we head to Keramat, Aunty Yan’s house, her whole family was admitted to the hospital 2 days before raya due to food poisoning. Poor them~

We paid them a visit before we set off to Izzee’s place. By that time is was already 5pm.

Staying at my eldest brother’s place really made me sleepy. The couch was SUPER COMFY [sofa baru sebenarnyer.. hehee..] , the fan was blowing, I was tired, had already fill my stomach with my sis-in-law’s SUPER rendang, I was O So Ready to shut my eyes, lay down and forget the world!

But unfortunate for me, I have SUPER BISING niece and nephew.. HAHAA!!!

Quesha and Aliya, Izzee’s children weren’t there with us to celebrate eid because they went to Subang, staying with their mother for the school holiday... I miss them... iskh.. iskh... T_T

Oh, before I forget, 1st Syawal this time around falls on my niece's Birthday, Izan's 2nd child, Shauqina Auni.. she turned 6 years old this year.. (:

I know.. I know, both of us are cute.. HAHAA!!!

Before I end my raya for the day wearing my Green Baju Raya, the last stop was my Opah’s house at Gombak Setia.

For raya, at her house, the only thing I will be looking for is her LAKSA!!!...

I chat with my opah for a bit, joke around, salam... then I went to chat with my cousins, letting Izzee chit chatting with opah.

My cousins planned to play bowling later at night, I wanted to join but I am no good at all in it.

So, I suggested to them to watch Step Up 3!.. jieyeahh~!!

Planned to watch it with my BBFF but till now we didn’t get the chance to watch it, so, with my cousins I went.. hahaa!!.. [gelak jahat..]

My cousins told me to wait for them at Wangsa Walk, as  it was night, I asked Kamil to drop me off, riding his motorcycle, it was indeed a kind of pleasure for me.

I always find riding motorcycle is FUN!

Unfortunate for me, Step Up 3 in Wangsa Walk was not in 3D version, but hey, I still get to watch it.

The movie was at 9pm, me, Ngah, KakCik, Bibah and Yong went to the cinema, while Faiz and Farid went to play bowling first.

After movie they persuade me to play bowling with them... haihh~

I’m not good in bowling but after a few lessons from my fav cousin Ngah, Alhamdulillah, I did quite good compared to last time I played with San, Atyn and Rean.. hehee...

Ngah was GREAT in bowling, even Yong!.. I envy them.... = ='

My fav cousin, Ngah... (^-^)

Then, next stop was McD drive through.

Here was the fun part! The guy taking our order got so messed up by us, hahaa!!

There were seven of us, each wanting different set, different meal. We took quite some time ordering our meal, and there were like 4 cars behind us, WAITING...

Later, they drop me off at Kamil’s house, I reached home by 12.30am, I know it’s late, but I was with my cousins, plus my mom knew, hehee..

Me and my mom enjoyed our meal! We already planned to eat McD thats why I bought McD, I remembered what my mom asked for.. (^-^)

As my eyes were about to close, my friend Faidhi called me, asking me how was my raya, he always use the term “ ko kan kakak aku” to me, haihh... I’m only one year older than you la Faidhi! But I’m used to that.. Hahaa!!

So, my entry for today prove that I do celebrate raya in KL only. From Wangsa Maju to Kepong to Keramat to Wangssa Maju again, then to Gombak Setia, then to Wangsa Walk... hehee...

Getting older is no good for raya.... why do I say so?... well, lets take a look at my duit raya.

When I was younger, I’ll get minimum 15 packets of duit raya, which sum up to minimum RM50-RM80.

Now, being at the age 21 years old, ermmm... I don’t even want to talk about duit raya, my mom got MUCH MORE THAN ME!!!!..

Don’t get me wrong, I love raya but this time around, there aren’t much fun. I don’t know how to explain, but I just didn’t get much fun out of it, I guess.

I know raya is not about having fun and all, but, I just... BORED? Feeling empty somewhere somehow?

 I Dunnoo La Darlingg~

Well, at least I get to have fun at night, going out for movie and bowling with my cousins.. AT LEAST~

That's it, I guess..

-out-

[NOT MUCH PICS WERE TAKEN, I DON'T KNOW WHY, A BIT DISAPPOINTED, BUT HEY, THE IMPORTANT THING IS THE MEMORIES BEING SHARED... poyo.. = =' ]